you alright?! (the british way of saying how are you... I used to think everyone thought I was doing bad)
so first off sorry if my sentences sound juvenile for the next 6 weeks... I am talking to a sister from pakistan, who speaks very little english, more than anyone and teaching her english but must explain things in simple terms .. hence the juvenile way of speaking in these last few sentences. It's starting to become how I think now too... what an issue. But there we are.
So announcements to respond to :
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM!! (heather did I miss your's from ages ago and Davin and everyone this year.. don't you worry.. it will be made up for in 11 weeks ... dad thanks for pointing that one out!)
(oh ps sooooooooo sorry I did not say it last week. I remembered and all and was all prepped to write it and then I guess got distracted and never actually said it.. bummer.)
Baby baby- how did I know that would happen!! I love pregnant people. hey heather do you remember when you and steve first got married and i nagged you for ages about when you were going to have a kid.. now you are on #5!!! congrats!!
Aaron and Aubrey- that blows my mind, I am sooooo happy for them. you are right mum they will be the best parents ever.
oh My companion's cousin is serving in Mesa right now. She spends part of the day in the visitors center and then part of the day in her area. She is sis. Javed as well. If you see her- do talk to her.. she's stunning. Tell her hello and cheerio from me and ssiter Javed!!
oh I saw a picture of paul tieman in one of our ward members old missionary albums.. he served in the EBM too!! so cool.
I am glad that everyone seems to be doing well and that grandma is settlnig well into her new place. I had sent her a letter to her old address, but it didn't make it so I need her new address.. or I'll just send it home and you can get it to her.. ya? ok. I have some stuff to send today anyways.. so get excited.. I am excited too. you may laugh alot and that is good, it is with purpose.
This back half of the week has been great. It's kinda crazy to have 2 areas and be the only one who "knows" them both.. especially with someone who doesn't know what anyone is saying 2/3 of the time.. it's improving :) I can't imagine how she feels. Yesterday morning I woke up frustrated, lonely, overwhelmed, and very irritable... yes the natural man did overcome me... dumb!! ... but As I fasted and prayed for strength and listened to the talks I had more peace, but that did not solve it because to be honest the pressure just got worse. At the beginning of transfers everyone just loves to bombard the missionary who they do know and ask her loads of questions and what not, which is good.. but my mindset was not good. Alot of the questions were for things sis. javed didn't understand or that I needed to explain to her, but it felt doable.. just irritating when everyone is doing it at the same time. Right before our dinner appointment something happened that I am grateful for because the ice was broken. Sis. Javed is deathly afraid of dogs. Like literally won't go near it she sees it and either my arm comes off or I am in need of a companion because she is gone. It's kinda ridiculous sometimes, but there we are. Anyways, the family whome we were visiting didn't have a dog, but there was a dog just out by the front of it and she wouldn't move and got mad with me because I didn't tell her.. I didn't know the neighbors had one... . now understand we were extremely late for this DA and by this point the whole dog thing was getting to me because it's out of my control. I don't mind asking people who we know and know we are coming to put their dogs away, but how do you say that to a stranger.. you know? especially when the dog isn't even paying attention to us... so I didn't loose it, but I snapped a little.. oh so embarrassing.. but it's ok my companion will be the angel in a second because really that is what she is. An angel. She came to the door and said 'i know, this is my weakness'. I understand why it is.. bless, her cousin was killed by a dog. but that night when we got home i felt bad. I don't have too long of a irritable behaviour before I snap out of it and think of the jerk face that I can be... we talked.. man it took a long time of prying... like all of language studdy, for her to finaly open up. And the thing that impressed me was that she wasn't mad at me for snapping. She isn't ever mad with me for anyithng... she is so Christlike. She just wants to do and be the best she can be and it taught me something about becoming like Jesus Christ. It taught me that if we always look in to see our weakness instead of anothers than we will never judge another. She loves to say who am I to judge another when I am not perfect... I thouht alot about that. It is something I love to tell people to put on in their character, but then I thought about it... who AM I to judge another? who is to say that I am not the only judgemental one of the bunch? Those who do not judge.. for realsies... are the ones that never tell anyone else not to judge. They only talk about their weaknesses, not others weaknesses. I am learning so much from my companion and yes sometimes it is frustrating, but why should I care? I am serving a servant of God and that is a privilege. She truly is a wonderful person and I am grateful that I get to learn from her for the next 6 weeks or so.
We taught Brian on saturday and it was amazing. He had told me the night prior on the phone that there was sometihng he was keeping from us... from the world for a long time and that he would tell us but that he wasn't sure he was worthy of baptism anymore because of it. This broke my heart to hear but saturday morning during my personal study I was reading 3 Nephi 9:13-22 and I knew that the Lord had something to tell Brian in these verses.. So I had left him Alma 36 and he read it and said I am alma... here's what happened (it's personal so I won't say over email) and then said and this is why I can't be baptized and I looked at him and knew that these verses were for him. So I asked if we could read them and on verse 20 he stopped. He couldn't read through all of it because of the tears .. and he said.. eventually... God IS saying this to me... this is for me. I knew at that moment that my Saviour loves His children. He knows us. He wants us to come back to Him and He has taken our sins upon Him that He might heal us from the imperfect state we dwell in while in this tabernacle of clay. In v. 15 Jesus Christ tells us "Behold, I am Jesus Christ the Son of God. I created the heavens and the earth, and all things that in them are. I was with the father from the beginning. I am in the Father, and the father in me; and in me hath the Father glorified his name." Now how can I relate this to us.. well I am Sister Lauren Lee Filichia (I am not saying I am Jesus Christ or anything, aight... just read on ;)) a daughter of God. I have been given the power to help create life and other creative things here upon the earth. Before I came to earth I was with the father since MY beginnining. If I live worthy I can be in the father, and if I give my will to God the father will be in me and through me, as His daughter since baptism, I will be able to glorify his name. I saw this and thought about how blessed we are to have the knowledge that we have. No I am not His begotten son, no I am not the creator of the universe, no i did not give my life that God's other children might have power over death, but I am one of His beloved daughters. I am a creator of life as a mother... someday... and for 18 months and for the rest of my life I will give my life to the Lord's work that I might glorify His name and bring His daughters and sons back to Him to dwell in His glory. This isn't just for me, but for all of us. Our purpose in life is not different to Jesus christ's, it is the same.. just maybe a lot less painful and much more imperfectly done. We are to help God bring to pass the immortality and eteral life of man. not just for 18-24 months, but for eternity. What can we do today to have the Father in us and us in the father? 3 Nephi 11 talks about how they couldn't understand the sound of God's voice till they looked steadfastly toward heaven. it is no different now than it was then. We will not recognize it till we look to Him in our lives. How can we have our lives facing steadfastly heavenward more now than yesterday? I am trying to be more like my saviour and am not always very good at it, but it's not about being perfect today it's about progressing everyday and I know that we can. i know that I am weak, but with God I can be strong and for that i will give my life to Him. Thank you for all of your prayers, your support, your love and more than anything your examples. I learn from all of you. My mind draws upon the different times when you all showed me who Christ is through the represntatives you are and because of that i will progress little by little (very little, I am a slow learner) each day. I thank you each for that.
Alright enough with the sermon.. so sorry.. everytime.. but I hope it is something that helps boost you somehow a little each week. Your emails do that for me and I am soooooo grateful for them!! i love you all I'll be seein' you!!
No comments:
Post a Comment