These past few days have been blissful... can I just say, it is so!! Ha but really. I am having so much fun with Sister Lewis and we are working hard. We find SOOOOO MUCH and it is fun. Now those of you who have served missions know that finding can be one of three things- necessity that isn't the most fun, but is the most necessary (and has it's moments...), a back up plan for the appointments, or something to look forward to- not going to lie for a while the third thing might not have been my main emotion towards it. I love doing all of missionary work and I love talking to EVERYONE I see and I love meeting new people, but getting rejected is probably low on the list of likes and high on the list of dislikes- but you get used to it because that's what we do, that's who we are and that's what we care about :) (thank you Mr. Slovinsky from Tommy Boy for your line). So we have found and found and had a total blast with it. I think that God answered my prayer to find myself- my personality- again. Sometimes when you serve you loose yourself so much in the work that you become a robot and literally loose your self. God sends us, who we are and what we are to refine and shape us, but not to kill who we are- He uses that part of us to do the work. I felt for a while like that part of me was slipping away and dwindling in the abiss but thank you to my Saviour for hearing my prayers and sending me a Sister Lewis who brought it out of me again so instantaneously. I feel like as I focus and immerse myself in this work and have fun with it that we really will be able to fullfill the plan that God has for this specific companionship.
I have gained a testimony of serving and letting others "see our good works, that they may glorify our Father who art in Heaven." So we were out tracting and going by loads of potentials and went and spoke to this lady that Sister Lewis and Sis. Stucki (last companion) had served not long ago and as we finished up the conversation the next door neighbor had come out and asked us who we were, what we were about and said that he had seen us around a time or two and was intrigued by us. So I guess he had looked up mormons on the internet (they'd given his wife stuff, so I assume it was Mormon.org) and he was stil intrigued and asked us to come over and teach him a bit about it. So at our first meeting he explained to us that his interest all started when he had been carrying groceries from his car and the sisters had offered help to him and whether he accepted or rejected was irrelevent- he felt there was sometihng different and the funny thing is they didn't share anything with him, but they had his wife and he knew something was right about this. So the first lesson went really well and at the beginning you could tell he enjoyed it, but it still didn't seem like he had conneccted to it quite yet, but Sister Lewis asked him a heaven sent qustion- do you have a question for God?- he did. He said with tears in his eyes, "I want to know if those who have gone past are ok" then I asked if he had lost someone close to him and he had and told us about it and ya know the spirit filled the room. We bore testimony to him of the plan of Salvation. I was able to tell him that I too had lost someone dear to me and the plan was the thing that kept me going and that's why I left my family for a time was so that others would have the comfort, joy, peace, and knowledge that I have so that no matter what happens they know it will be ok. I knew at that moment that for Kevin we were representatives of Christ because of the fact that for 5 minutes, Sis. Lewis and I stepped out and the Saviour stepped in through us to speak to His child whom He knew and was able to use what we knew from our experiences in life to help this man. I hope it all works for him and that he is able to share with his wife what he is feeling and experiencing, but even if he doesn't I am grateful for the moment I had to help lift someone's burdens and to gain a knowldge for myself that the plan of salvation is in fact the plan of God for His children of whom we are.
I was asked to give a talk yesterday in church and had ... ok so let's be honest... I didn't give myself loads of time to prepare, I never do, but I did prepare and the spirit was there. I am amazed at how when I rely fully on the spirit to guide because although I have a "plan" I don't actually have a complete one, I am not nervous, just kerfuffled inside, but what comes out is what needs to. I was so unsure after it even though I was completely calm during it and people told me after that it was this and that and I didn't believe them till Sis. Lewis expressed to me her feelings abou it all and what I had said and I didn't actually remember saying that and then realized I hadn't. I love the spirit and gift that God gives us to be able to use it. Sis. Lewis explained something to me this morning that she thought of as she was studyin the Plan of Salvation in Preach my Gospel. She shared a quote with me that says that "Nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm." and then said we are God's work and His glory- He is enthusiastic to bless us, to listen to us, to help us, and even sometimes to chasten us when we need it. He is enthusiastic because we are His glory and as we grow and become even as He is, and gain glory as He has His work is being accomplished and He loves us so mch. I think it is important for us to know and realize that if God puts us to it, He will make the way to get us through it- we just have to turn to Him. We too often try to accomplish things on our own and how silly when He already knows how. If we but turn to Him in all things then we may " know the truth of ALL things". I would invite each of you to turn to your Saviour with each trial faced at this time. We are all always going through something because we are all always being refined to become like Him- if we aren't then we are not fulfilling our purpose in this life. Sometims it is harder for others than some, but maybe that is just our invitation from the saviour to fullfill our baptismal covenants and have the strength and opportunity to mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort. I know that as we do it for another we will find it two fold for ourselves in our deepest and darkest moments. They come and when they come don't fret, there is a future- that's why they came- to give you a future with your Heavenly Father. I know this to be true. I know that God lives. I know He loves us all individually and with enthusiasm. He is ready and waiting for you to take upon yourselves His name by using the atonement more fully in our lives by living the gospel with enthusiasm. Our mission president's wife sent something to us today that I cut down and want to share with you:
Immerse yourselves in the work. We are a church of 'immersion'. As we immerse ourselves in our Heavenly Father's work and in the Gospel, it becomes more a part of us. We are a church of immersion. We baptize by immersion. We immerse ourselves in the Gospel principles. We immerse ourselves in the scriptures
We immerse ourselves in giving service to others. I know the more you allow yourselves to be immersed in the work, the happier you'll be, the more growth you'll experience, and the more you'll feel the companionship of the Holy Ghost -Sister Judy Ogden
Please, let us immerse ourselves in the gospel of Jesus Christ- it's the only intelligent thing to do. I love you all. Hope your week is fantastic and that you recognize and make the miracles happen. Talk to you soon!!
Love for and for always,
Sista Fili
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