FAMILY!!!! WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!!!!
Well this is kind of insane. I never thought it would happen. But it is and I still don't know how I feel about it. Everyday I have a different emotion but this weekend with Steve's baptism it was one of sadness I guess you could say. I realized that this time of my life to preach the gospel full time and be apart of people's conversion stories is over in this way. Then I took a good look at Lisa, Steve's fellowshipper who brought the gospel into his life and realized it's not completely over. There is still more to do without a badge and authority to knock on doors and street contact. I then just today recieved an email from a sister I served in the MTC with who flew over with me and we had chatted with this man on the plane and she told me that he was baptized last November and we definitely helped him get there. I thought about sooo many instances in life when I have witnessed missionary work happening significantly without even seeing missionaries on the scene apart from teaching the doctrine and then I realized the greatest thing ever: my mission is not over, it's only begun. My emotions soon turned from sadness to joy for the covenants I have made, the purpose God has given me and the opportunities that lie ahead. This is the Lord's work. I will forever be indebted to Him for allowing me to be apart of it in this way. I don't look at the last 18 months as service to God, but yet again His service to me. Every opportunity I have had to bear testimony, mine has grown; to teach, my knowledge has expanded; to serve, my charity been made full; to proclaim repentance for anything, my desire increased. I know that this truly was the best 18 months for my life and I can't wait for what lies ahead. He doesn't give us moments in life to be better than other moments because we are closer to God then then we are there.. we are meant to have joy all through out life. No I won't be endowed with power from on high to be able to fullfill the mission He has called me to, but I will still have the gift of the Holy Ghost, the scriptures, prayer, repentance, church, temple and time to serve. I can still feel a fullness of joy because I can still live a more excellent way and walk in the footsteps of my Saviour. This gospel in all it's fullnes is for life, not for 18 months. We teach people about missionary work as a commandment... because it is. I am grateful I have learnt that because before I came out I think I lacked that understanding. I always was happy with myself and so impressed by others when it would happen, but I was like most.. unaware of the duty I had to do it, not just grab hold of the experiences as they come, if I want to that is and it's convenient. Nope, it's not convenient. Nope it's not ALWAYS going to be what you want to do, that's why you need to do it. Put off the natural man and go and do the things which the Lord has commanded and yield to the enticings of the Holy spirit. (1Nephi 3:7, Mosiah 3:19) I think it is interesting that it says the 'enticings'. I was just teaching Sis. Javed what the word enticing means. It is to attract, to really persuade someone of something that they want... Allow the Holy Spirit to entice you to do what is right. It is what we want, we just don't remember because we are clouded by the natural man and all that that encompasses. I love my Saviour. I love all that He does for me. This week I have truly felt His spirit near and my prayers from over the past 18 months are being answered now. What a blessing! God loves His children and I know without a doubt in my mind that I am one of them. Answers to prayers do come in the Lord's timing. All the space in between is Him preparing us for the TIME we will recieve it and making us worthy and ready for recieving it. It's not just about us waiting, but the experiences we will have so that when it is recieved it is also appreciated. I think we often forget that God knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows when we will appreciate and when we will take it for granted. We take so much for granted that He gives us so willingly, like He would give customized blessings to us without our working for it. Let's think about it, It always costs a more when it is customized at a shop .. same thing with blessings. All things denote there is a God and all things can teach us of God and His ways. I love it and this knowledge, nothing could be better.
So, this week we saw Steve daily. We taught him with Lisa daily and it was amazing. I wish this was our life weekly, but I am grateful I was blessed to experience it once before I leave. He stopped smoking easily in one week. wow. He became more and more excited each day and with every commandment his determination grew. It was so neat to see that as he kept the commitments more and more his countenance began to change. On Friday night we had our final lesson on baptism and confirmation and the gift of the Holy Ghost. It was brilliant and the spirit was there, but we finished within a half hour and I felt like we needed to do one more thing for him that he needed, I couldn't figure it out but then it was slapped in my face basically- FINDING FAITH IN CHRIST DVD!! hello! haha Steve does not really have a religious background. He believes in Chrsit and I would like to say now he is beginning to believe Christ, but that is without an understanding or a knowledge of all he did during His earthly ministry. So when the thought came to my mind it made complete sense. We watched it and once it concluded I asked Steve what he thought and how he felt. He said so much of it was so sad. Then we talked about how if we follow in Christ's footsetep it doesn't mean our life will be full of roses and joy and never any sorrow, His life waws not like that. We follow in Chrsit's footsteps through thick and thin for the roses and the thorns to become perfect even like he is, for that is truly what He did. As we concluded this chat I asked him how he felt and he looked at me and said I feel like I can honsestly say I have Faith in Christ now. It was a marvelous moment to have. He said his first spoken prayer with us that evening and yes I did cry, the spirit was massive. I decided then that coming home was unecessary.. and then ya know it wore off because of what I said earlier. :)
I love you all. I love this work. I love that people recognize as servants of God. We had a man stop us on the street and ask us to pray for him. Theen he turned out to be kinda psycho and possibly a creeper and alittle doped up on drugs, but there we are. The first instance still stands true!! I will never forget it for as long as I live. Woot woot. Well tis the week of much happening. I don't want to get distracted by it all. Sometimes it is difficult, but that's when you just keep yourself busy busy busy. This last week we were blessed with it and this next week we shall be as well. I pray!!! haha
2 John 1:12 Having many things to write unto you, I would not awrite with paper and ink: but I trust to come unto you, and speak face to face, that our joy may be full.
Tada for now! I will see you soon!!
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