So family... so much to tell but guess what. I had my first child!!!! Sister Giles from Aylesbury, England (in the London Mission boundaries) It's gonna be great. I am excited and overwhelmed and hoping that i can actually fullfill this huge responsibility. I don't think I am fully ready, but in what situation are you ever... ya know? So it's going to be a great 12 week adventure.. welll maybe 11 week, I think we have a 5 week transfer this time. maybe next... who knows. Anyways, what a week it has been. Sister Brooks and I were able to do alot of work and that was great. I am finding a new love again for this work. Everyday it gets more and more embedded in me and it excites me to the bone. This is such an intense thing we are doing and really if you think about the whole purpose of life it's a pretty intense thing we are doing!! holy cow!! we are lucky God is merciful and loves us super much. we could be out with the dogs!!!

So, on Sunday we went to this DA with the Walker family in our Branch and for the spiritual thought they pick an object and we pick a scripture to go along with it... so uh my mind went blank.. not that i am a real scriptorian anyways, but then the little i do know left me. They gave me a furry white head band thing to keep your head warm. So ya know some people would find this easy.. I made it difficult of course.. but brought it back with humour.. like you could really imagine me doing something spontaneous without a bit of awkwardness thrown in there.. I mean come on!!! So i chose 2 Nephi 1:15 which reads "the Lord hath redeemed my soul from hell. I have beheld His glory and am encircled about eternally in the arms of His love." So I said "well the cold is hell for me so this band hath redeemed me from hell and I have beheld it's glory and rejoiced in it and am encircled about comfortably in the Love God gives me by helping the man create this lush piece of clothing!" awkward- I say yes. but enjoyable- totally. We had a good laugh.

Zone conference was on Tuesday and it was incrdible. The Action points we have are all questions about what more can we do and ! thought about how in any walk of life.. what more can we do? that's the whole point. I am grateful for the ability we have to be agents unto ourselves and seek the inspiration of God for myself and at this current moment for those whome I am called to serve.

Well So much to say and sooooooo little time, all I know is that we really do effect those around us and I pray that I effect others in the right way. I just have this goal to learn more from others humbly than I expect them to learn from me and maybe in the end they will then learn something from me... a Nick Johnson approach.

So Justin Halbert and his wifey are prego... psycho.

Heather you are the best!!! Ten Virgins is great!!!

Matt- keep your head up and use this time to become closer to God than you ever have. Many times our trials are to being us to a remembernce of our God 2 Nephi 10:20.

Liz- I am sure you are great!! i love you loads.

Dad- the group sounds like it's all gonig soooo well. I am so glad they tore it up and I know that they are truly wonderful representatives of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I am glad also that work pays for your gas... it's all so expensive. it's even worse here. ps how is refdir doing?

Mum- you are the greatest mum ever. I am so grateful for the love and care you give!!

 I lvoe you all and hope i have a better email next week. Miracles dooooooo happen!! Godbless!

sista Fili

Family, so much is happening at home! Dad I am so proud of you for winning that award and for just being an amazing director,, father, husband, and example. I hope all is well with the kids and that they treat Amber nicely.. if not I can tell them off via letter :) jk. I lvoe that ward and Amberare so involved in things now. So great! Mum your emails always make me smile. I am sooo glad all is well with everyone and that wedding announcements are flying to our home! it's the best. Matt, keep your head up. Just keep holding fast to the Rod of iron!! don't cling every once in a while, but to hold fast is to be diligent and consistent in the way we hold to it. heather and Liz .. I hear your the best mum's ever... totally true. liz thank you thank you for the valentine. I lvoed it!! Zone Conference is tomorrow and i am sooo excited.

So experience of the week ya'll- this woman Angelina, we are teaching her and she is from Africa her first language is Zulu and she is awesome. So crazy, but sooo cool. So the missionaries have been teaching her for ages!! and a few weeks ago when we were on exchange Sis. Brooks and Sis. wheatley went to visit her and find out how "progressable" she is. For a while she had been our 'service' project I guess. She wasn't progressing and we'd see her every fortnight (2 weeks) to 6 weeks because she needed it and would request the missionaries to come by, so we did... anyways, she told them of an experience she had awhile ago in a dream. She had been reading the restoration leaflet and saw the picture of Joseph Smith and told the sisters she had seen this man before in her dream... she explained the way he was dressed- temple clothes basically- and asked why it said he WAS a prophet and not IS a prophet? the next time we went by she spoke to us about what church is and asked if she could come and be baptized. um yes angelina please let our dreams come true. amazing!! the only problem is that our branch 5 years go when she came to chruch and made a scene (a culture difference mishap basically) and through her out and told the missionries and the branch she was never allowed back. When I heard this I was determined to bring her back and allow the branch to become more Christ like. My mind went to 2 nephi 26: 26-28

         "Behold, hath he commanded any that they should depart out of the synagogues or out of the houses of worship? behold, isay unto you, nay.

          Hath he commanded any that they should not partake of his salvation? Behold I say unto you nay but he hath given it free for all men; and he hath commanded his people that they should persuade all men to repentance.

          Behold hath the Lord commanded any that they should not partake of his goodness? Behold I say unto you nay; but all men are privileged the one like unto the other and none are forbidden.

oh the branch had a hard time and my companion took ti from them (Angelina was with me the whole time) but you know what she didn't say anytyhing out of character. She hs been going to another church for the last 5 years and they took the opportunity to teach her reverance.. shame we didn't. but none the less family as she sat with me and held my hand my body was shaking from nervousness, but she calmed me and allowed me to see her through God's eyes. He loves us ALL and those who truly know Him come unto Him through his children. I am grateful for her example and diligence and for the example of the branch members who acepted her. She went and shook every hand of every erson in there and I know it made an impact on all there, whether they will admitt it or not. God loves us all and the worth of souls is great in the sight of God (D&C 18:10-16) I am grateful for my calling and I am even more grateful for this experience to be about my Father's business and not fear the men around me. We are all not perfect and sometimes we show it more outwardly than other times but repentance, love, charity, diligence, and forgiveness are real and if we have yet to of obtained them we can start today, it's never too late.

I lvoe you all so very much and I am grateful for the examples you are to me and the love you share with me and all around you. your the best!! Talk to you next week, hope you valentine days were the bomb.com... mine was... not for any particular reason, just for the fact that i was missionary and didn't have to worry about a singles club :) it was on purpose this time. joy to the world. I'll be seein you!

 

Love you sooooooooooooo much, God's Speed.

Sista Fili

Hello family, it's been a good week and I feel so blessed to have such an incredible family that prays for me.. I truly can feel your prayers.

matt- I remember kinda feeling like you are right now before I got my call .. I got set back too. It isn't the same as you, but I can sympathize with you. something my mission president's wife said to us this wee struck me and I think you could use it at this time.

 "What is cheaply obtained is lightly esteemed. Heaven knows how to place a price on its goods." Thomas Payne In other words, we place a lot more value on things that we work the hardest for. That is why your work as missionaries becomes increasingly precious to you. That is also why making and keeping commitments helps your investigators place greater value on the principles of the Gospel. This is also why its important for the members to involve themselves in the work. As they labor alongside of you, they will begin to see the joy and happiness that sharing the gospel brings into their lives. It is you job to lead your investigators and the members you serve with to this point...but with gentleness and love unfeigned.

right now it's hard to see the silverling on this specific situation, but the mission will become more sweet to you as you overcome the challenges to get there. it is hard to be with companions 24/7... hardest part of the mission is that I think. it's all about controlling and refining yourself, but you become so much better for it.. I feel it thus far.

So becka Ellingson is gonig to guatemala.. so cool. i read some of your letter mum, and pa I am gonig to read it soon... like right after this. but I printed off the music and listened to it.. brilliant. i was asked to sing something in the branch here soon, i might try to squeeze that in somehow :) we'll see. I need to figure out how to get that song on disc, maybe next week wjhen I am in my regular place and can better work stuff. I am on exchange today and tomorrow with sister baker. I was in the MTC with her, so it's gongi to be fun. I can't wait. but the computer situation is a little different this week. so basically today I may have a short email. Sorry.

This week the work has been good. i lvoe how the spirit works. We were in a teaching appt. with the elders on Wednesday and us 4 hadn't coordinated as well as we should have for it and it was on obedience and the WoW.... so Duncan and Adrienn are the two we were teaching and they got kinda defensive because they are soooo good in soooo many ways, the WOW is their vice, it's their one thing.... but if we love God we will keep His commandments. As we shared johmn 14:15.. that simple verse. 'if ye love me keep my commandments.' it brought the spirit in and we were able to help them become humble and say, ok we'll try. my o my we couldn't do it because we are weak and not good teachers, but the spirit can becsue he is the teacher and it's his job and he testifies of truth unmistakably.. that's it. The Holy Ghost is real and I love the personage of spirit with all my heart. I couldn't do this work without him in my life right now. I pray I never loose Him in my life ever. it's a harsh feeling.

i am so happy for all the joy that is happening and I pray that we all continue to see and feel the joy of life.. of God. i lvoe you!!

love Sista fili

sorry made a mistake. any ways....

 

1 Nephi 7:15 states And now behold I say unto you that if ye will return unto jerusalem (our past sins symbol to me) ye shall also perish with them. and now if ye have choice, go up to the land, and remember the words which I speak unto you, that ye go ye will also perish; for thus the spirit of the Lord constraineth me that I should speak.

this spoke to me of the answer i needed. We cann't dwell in the past.. Rafiki even teaches us that in Lion King when he hits Simba on the head with the stick... it's in the past it don't matter, but it still hurts... so what are you going to do about it? if you forget about it the pain will ease, if you focus on it you can make yourself believe you are growing a crown on your head!

I feel so strongly that mistakes happen and people make them. Don't let someone's poor decision ruin how you think of them. The power of forgiveness is real, as God forgives and we hang on we shut people off from being able to grow, or stunting their growth when it finally all comes out. I know that God lives and loves me.. he is only a prayer away. it is literal and it is refining. I am understanding more and more why things happen and even when I don't understand I can still look to God and know just as Nephi did that all things are for the intent to bring souls unto christ.. even if it means getting them on their knees first. I hope we can all strive to forgive and look to the future. my firend told me this last night what's in the past is concrete, you can't change it and trying is just messy and unproductive, but the future is cement and the way is not yet paved till we start molding it. get out your shovels and blueprints people we got some molding to do if we are to end up in the kingdom of our heavenly father!

 

can't wait to find out matt's excitying news good luck, I lvoe you!!

 

Sista fili

 

what a week. i was a little ill this week. it's a bug going around but i am fine now, no worries. Sister Brooks was really good to me and cooked for me and just made sure everything was taken care of, I really felt so blessed. I am so lucky to have people around me that care and love me that help me to remember God's love.

So t Brower... no one told me where he's going!! St. Louis.. Missouri? soooo cool. I am soo proud of him. he will be amazing. Is Amber going to wait for him? and Blake lesuer.... wow, he worte me at the beginning, I thought about writing him and finding out what's gonig on.. guess I won't be donig that. Any more news on mcKenna? Jojo love her and Tyler is SOOOOO perfect for her. I love them. I can't wait to talk to them at some point. can I please get thier address? or the tuckers address? I have an elder in my ditrict who may or may not need to steal her heart from this guy, or at least be given the option.. he's practically in lvoe with her.. he's a toro too :) girl's got it going on, what can I say.

Grandma nancy... birthday time!! I sent them a postcard today, but I failed to put happy birthday on it... good thing grandma usually doesn't mind that stuff. hopefully it hasn't failed me still!!

So packages go to the mission home and our zone leaders pick up our stuff whenever they go to the mission home and give it to us at district meeting on wednesday's. sometimes it's everyother week, sometimes it's every week. just depends, but I am excited for the package and will let you know when i recieve it. thank oyu so much!!

I feel at a loss of words right now for anything but the power of the Saviour's grace. I was reading in 1 nephi 7:17-18 this morning and feeling very connected to it. God answers our prayers through the scripures we read when we ask and sincerely seek to find. I was struggling this morning with a great question and one that I promised I would not do anything else until I found it and God knew it and gave it readily. I am grateful for the miracle of forgiveness. It trully is a miracle and something that is not easy, but sooo necessary. if we can't forgive the past than we will perish. in verse 15 it talks about this.. to me at least...

 

Family. What a glorious day it is today.. pday is always a joy. I woke up this morning for the first time in a while wondering where the heck I was and what I was doing with my life. You can tell my nights rest was that fantastic full of dreams that didn't make sense and some were borderline scary in fact, but none the less I woke up and was sooooo happy to say oh it's pday!! haha silly, doesn't really make sense, but maybe someone of you have felt that before in your lives. I guess it kinda goes with my thoughts a little yesterday.. not trunky thoughts, but thoughts regarding who I am today and who i will be because of it tomorrow. I really thought about the member I will be when I have completed this full time missionary experience and how the type of missionary I am now has everything to do with it. God has given us such wonderful opportunities to live and breathe and have experiences in life that coinside one with another. Each effects the next one perfectly, although it may seem that way at first, it is sooo true and I am realizing it everyday more and more. I love being a missionary and some mornings I make myself giggle when I wake up and my dream land, is my reality!! iIt's kinda crazy.. but then I think maybe that's life.. this is all but a small moment and everyday can be a dream land made into reality if we choose to see it that way. I always think of my old acting teacher who asked if your life could e a sitcom or movie or musical what would it be.. dud my life is musical, sitcom and movie!!! I tihnk each of us have it in our own way. It doesn't take grand things to make a movie, it takes the simple miracles of life to make someone's day brighter and we have hold of them each and everyday. It's all in the way we look at it.

"Even if you cannot always see the silverlining on your clouds, God can, for He is the very source of light you seek. He does love you and He knows your fears, He hears your prayers, He is your Heavenly Father and surely He matches His own tears with those of His children."- unknown

Another quote from my lovely working buddy!

So Aunt Mel is going to be in my prayers.. poor thing. Scare me silly reading that!! But I am so glad everything is ok with her now. Just keep me posted. And McKenna... ya you don't need to save the details till later!! I'll forget to ask. Do tell now please :) I can't wait to recieve the contacts and stuff... THANK YOU MOTHER!! and pa for supplying me with the things I need.. and anyone else if they were involved in the process. Sonmething I love about our family is that it's usually never a single effort loads of times it's a group effort. We really have worked to work together and I love it.. it's rare people!! So Amber choreographing makes me sooooooo happy!! I lvoe it. I thought about it and she is brilliant for that, total dancer and performer and great with kids. I bet she loves it too. especially if they all get on in a focused manner. And that they are all sooo unified and love it when matt comes. man somethings just give me the chivers of joy and that is one of them. So which AOL group ou talking dad, Aol #1 or AOL#4 winter season? Both were golden!

I love that Kendra, Carrie, and Alexis are my freinds and come over to talk to you. Really I almost cried reading that!! i tried to print off the picture kendra sent me of you and her.. but it didn't work and now I can't pull it up at all.. dumb (so kendra feel free to send it agin.. I'll be smarter with it this time!!) But really thank you mum for being cool enough that they want to come and thank you carrie and kendra for going. I feel like i was there in a strange way, even though I wasn't. Jen are you gonig to AZ anytime soon? You said you were gonna... hmm ;) jk.. you do too much!! I feel so blessed to be amongst such incredible people who show their love for me and my family so often. We are a rare people!

So politics... people here try to talk politics, but they don't really know much and I don't know anything officially, so I just say haven't been there in a while don't knowdon't care.. which is a semi lie but according to the white handbook we're not supposed to care, but I appreciate your updates so you can continue!! I love it. It is so interesting and i am excited to find out. will I be back in time to actually vote? man it's crazy. dad i fully agree some companions are given to slow down time.. but with this one it's spead up incredibly... so maybe it will be with the next companion. I actually feel really blessed to have the companions I have had. It's usually always me making the conflicts... haha real surpriser. But i mean it's a two way relationship and luckily it's never in the missionfield acually eternal... so wei're good. But I do miss Sister Lauritzen. We were an old married couple, pair of sisters. I hope she visits you when she goes to visit her brother in pheonix, she said she would!! Who knows.

So Savannah is getting married. Lucky dog!! that's proper tidy. I love that girl. Ya mum if you could hold on to all of my friends wedding invitations I would appreciate that mucho. Just sticck them in my room if needs be :)

So dad do you mind getting me Jeanette's address again? I have tried sending things for her 3 times now with the address I recieved or even email address would be fine and it's nevr worked, always gets back to me. :(

Matt the pictures were taken at a less actives house in Newcastle Emlyn.. Sister lauritzen and Elder Walton (elder Johnson was there too obviously...) took them for me and ya... we laughed pretty hard as well. Now remember the D word is not bad here it's like our crap, rude to some, but acceptable over all. So I just gave you some pure British humour.. not too apostate humour ;)

The baptism this weekend went well and in a few years I think he will appreciate it more, but it was a trial of his faith and oh how blessed I feel to have been a part of it all. Life is great and the chruch is in fact true. We are so very blessed to know what we know and be able to share it with others. I am having the time of my life and it's not easy, but it's all worth it!! Thank oyu for helping me serve the Lord. Every prayer and every act of serveice one to another helps me in more ways than you will ever know!! Keep sharing all your experiences with me. I love them all!!!

 

Sista Fili... chchchchia

 

ps. Today is my 9 month mark. Half way... holy camridge.

 

Alrighty family... how are all of you!!! man every week is so fantastic and everyweek something happens when I think of at least one of you if not all of you and go.. yes I am so appreciative of my family and or I am in awe with your testimonies. I was thinking this week of the miracle it is that sooooo many are so strong in the church. Being with so many who aren't (less actives) and then knowing some of the needs of the faithful strong members you begin to realize that a testimony is nothing short of a miracle. It is hard work to keep up and having a faith in jesus Christ is not always 'cool' by the standing of the world, but how 'cool' is it really... we know God. The creator of the universe the Father of our spirits, the supreme being and the coolest part is he not only knows us, he loves us and each of us can have a very personal relationship with Him if we but walk into His light.. I don't know any celebrity of higher up in the world that has such easy ccess.. because really someone who is perfect is no respector of persons, because he loves perfectly and has no prejudice. man we are sooo lucky to know these things.

in Relief Society this week we were talking about Charity. It was the 2nd lesson in the George Albert Smith book ... brilliant isn't it... and I was able to share an experience or two about my airplane rides and then I just said.. ya know my mother has neverfr met a stranger, and she is sooo observant of people, I think that's why. She recognizes her borther and sisters when she sees them, because she allows herself to see them and then to speak with them. Now our whole family and alot of our friends are like this and at that moment I realized how blessed I am to have grown up with these examples of righteousness. One of the ladies comments and said, you're right no one is really a stranger, they're just not seen for who they really are. Isn't it sooo true. Never see anyone as a stranger, you might not be able to remembe their name from before and hey may frustrate you but deep inside ll people is our brother and or sister and how glorious the reunion will be on the otherside when we talk and joke about sorry I didn't recognize you I was a little lost, but you said hello to me and it sparked something in me, I just couldn't put my finger on it. I hope I can be that for someone.. I hope we can all be that for everyone.

This last week, Damien, our investigator who is getting baptized this weekend slipped up a bit on his smoking stuff and he's been working for a about 4 months for baptism and it's finally at his finger tips and oh the broken heart he had when he thought all was lost. The chains of the devil are binding, but the light and lvoe Christ gives is freeing. We called president to find out if he had to push the baptism back or not and president's reply was it's up to you and sister Brooks, if you think he's repentant and truly repentant then we can't deny him the cleansing power of the atonement through baptism. That is alot of responsibility president, thank you... ahhh.. that's how we felt. But we botyh prayed soooo sincerely and in my thoughts this morning I thought about choice and agency. I thought about how when forced to do things that are good and put down if not doing them we kick against them and justify our bad behaviour, but when we're given a choice between right and wrong not condescending, but with consequences on both ends, given the whole side of it we actually begin to use logic. What a concept the lord allows us to figure out. he gave us the option before we came to eartyh to choose His plan and forego Satan's but while on the earth we still can choose what plan we want because the war is not over and some do choose satan's plan after a while and they are bound to him and it is the saddest thing to watch becuse they llose everything and have no choice. Even when the good option is given, they don't like it becasaeu it's hard or they feel unworthy and will never be good enough for it and therefore forego the blessings of freedom in God. This morning I was reading in Ether 15 and Coriantumr finally figures out that the prophet Ether was telling the truth. his prophesies have come to pass every whit and goes and repents. However his people do not and forefeight that option to have the spirit of Christ with them to help them win the battle against Shiz (literally and metephorically ;)) and in verse 19 it states what the consequense was.. satan had rule over them and he would not save them, for he does not love them. How merciful our God is to give us a choice.. I pray we will never forefeight the choice to have joy in our lives. That we will never forget that God is freedom and loves us unconditionally. here is a quote my lovely companion gave me 9oh by the way it was transfers this week and we are staying the same!)

'We must be willing to place all that we have not just our possessions (they may be the easiest things or all to give up) but also our ambition, pride, stubborness, and vanity. We must place it all on the altar of fgod, kneel down in silent submission and willinggly walk away.' - Jeffrey R. Holland

I love you all!! keep up the good member missionary work you are so incredible at!!

Sista Fili!!!!